Happy Camper

Home today from a week camping on the far south coast. Bracing but fun. I'll put up a proper post later, but wanted to share the joy this sign brought my pedant's heart:

I'n not saying anything.

You won't get a whisper out of me on this. Nup. Not me. And I thought we were skirting the boundaries with "Sage". Nahh. Jeeeesus farking Christ . Gaelan.

That is all. It has to be.

Big Brother 06 - Frequently Annoying Questions

It's that time of year again - and as the excitement mounts, so does the incomprehension. For the benefit of fans of Big Brother who are weary of defending it, here are the answers to some of the Frequent Annoying Questions about it. I welcome further questions and answers and embellishments of all kinds.

1. Big Brother is crap

EG - the Australian Family Association says Big Brother is "banal sewage pumped into our living room", and that “While chennel 10 is making money, Big Brother can do no wrong. Now is the time to strile on censorship, Big Brother is the right battle, and the sponsors are the right targets.”

Sure it's crap. Of course it's generally banal. But try to pick your friends wisely - if you think AFA is taking time out of its busy abortion-opposing schedule for a one-off Big Brother campaign, think again. They like LOTS of censorship, and think “There is an urgent need to have mandatory filtering out of pornography by Internet Service Providers.”

Also, I find it difficult to accept being told what I should watch by someone who can’t spell or write proper. That might just be me.

2. "I have to say that I am really surprised (shocked?) that intelligent people of the type who post and comment at LP actually watch Big Brother."

Well, you should get out more.

3. You’re … you’re all hooked on BB trash!!

Probably. We do tend to get a little overexcited at the beginning of a new series, but familiarity eventually breeds contempt. Many of us get bored in the middle of the season, but get back into it by the end.

4. The housemates are stupid exhibitionists and you do them no favours by watching.

The housemates usually are stupid exhibitionists. Indeed, that is rather the point. A voyeuristic show based on cringing introverts doesn't have much in the way of va-va-voom, does it?

And you read blogs because of your deep aversion to voyeurism, right?

5. BB relies purely and simply on purient titillation and the standard conventions of soapie character identification.

Yeah, pretty much. We know this stuff. And We Still Like It.

6. It's not as good as (reality genre show of choice).

Survivor is better than BB. Temptation Island was also thoroughly excellent viewing. All other reality shows are more crap than BB.

Update: comicstriphero justifies her love, and here's my attempt at explaining the BB appeal from last year (comments are still there, haloscan just pretends you don't have any after a few months, even if you cough up for a premium membership)

Zoe blasts "rubbish" Prime Minister in Lodge

"We need a curriculum that encourages an understanding of the high-quality literature and not the rubbish." - John Howard
Rubbish. We need a curriculum that teaches us to analyse, appreciate and understand.

Understanding - and comprehension and intellectual curiosity- are perhaps a little more than the Prime Minister can manage: "When asked about the West Australian Government's "outcome-based" education program, Mr Howard replied: "That is gobbledegook - what does that mean?"

"If I don't know about it, it's not worth knowing about" can now join the Prime Minister's favourite mantra "It wasn't me, you didn't see it, you can't prove a thing."


Update: Dr Faustus casts his elegant eye over the same idiotic pronouncement here. And have a sniff around while you're there, he's very good.

You knew it was coming

Nah, not the resurrection! Or Passover! Though you're very wry ;)

It's Stuff on My Cat:
















A ram's head snail, to be precise.

Rolling Vanstone?

I haven't seen much of Julie Bishop, Minister for Education, Science and Training and (ahem) Minister Assisting the Prime Minister for Women's Issues before, but I saw Barrie Cassidy's interview with her on last week's Insiders. I thought she was vile, though Barrie seemed rather charmed.

I can see why she's being tipped for Big Things, as we slowly watch Amanda Vanstone get pushed further and further into the shadows. Bishop's very polished and knows her lines inside out. It's the Federal Government's job to ensure Parents Have Choice about their kid's education (by funding wealthy private schools). Any action necessary to make choice meaningful is the responsibility of the State Governments.

The Federal government is also happily responsible for Flags, Values, Anthem-Singing and Report Cards that Pull no Punches.

My favourite bit was this:

BARRIE CASSIDY: Brendan Nelson, of course, is keen on students singing the anthem and raising the flag. Do you have a passion in that area as well?

JULIE BISHOP: Well, every morning when I was at primary school we sang the national anthem and raised the school flag and it was something that I remember with some fondness. As I travel around Australia and visit schools the children seem to share that same pride in singing the anthem and putting up the flag. I think it's a wonderful thing.

BARRIE CASSIDY: I don't know if it's a daily thing, though. I think it's probably more common that it's done once a week in assembly.

JULIE BISHOP: Well, they certainly do it when I'm at their schools. Every time I visit a school we have a flag-raising ceremony and they sing the national anthem.

Most of the members of this Government really do seem to believe that the world is what they can see from their window.

Tony Abbott offers some media advice to Julie Bishop (a different one).

Infrequently asked questions

Given my enormous affection for puns, why do I find myself screaming two paragraphs into anything written by or about Kathy Lette?



(The photo is from a R E Grant fan site. I've always been a fan, but not like The REGiment, whose fan art is everything you'd hope for.)

Fish Prank

In the grand tradition of Stuff on my Cat, I bring you "Stuff in my fish tank":

Meanwhile, in the community sector

My new workmate - let's call her Elena - is a hawt vegetarian lesbian lefty who buys me little liquid coffee chocolates and makes the wrapping paper into origami birds.

That's her in the background.

She's single, and likes Nordic blonde athletic types.